Monday, June 17, 2013

Why am I nervous?

Tomorrow is my interview and demonstration lesson as part of the process of returning to H&R Block as an instructor.  I shouldn't be nervous at all.  I know the material I'm covering backwards, forwards and sideways.  I have years and years of experience as an instructor.  I know I'm good, not because I think I am, but because the feedback I get from my students tells me I am.  The ones who know I'm going back into the classroom are already clamoring to take classes from me.

But I'm nervous.  I don't know why.  My usual obsession with being prepared had me up late last night making lesson plans and hand-outs.  I will probably only have to teach one of the two demonstration lessons, but I'm ready to do both.  I even re-read the publications and form instructions for the material being covered.  I guess I'll just have to be nervous until tomorrow when it's over.

* * *

Today is June 17th.  I got out of the hospital and came back "home" on June 1st.  In the more than two weeks that have passed since the doctor let me come home, I've wanted to put salt on my scrambled eggs every morning.  This morning it was even more tempting than ever, because today's eggs were the blandest yet.  But I didn't.  I want to have a V-8 more than anything.  Every time I see one in the refrigerated section of a store, it is simply astonishing how strong the desire to have one is.  I haven't.

I'm not patting myself on the back.  I'm recognizing that in some ways, these kinds of things are somewhat like alcohol is to alcoholics.  The difference is that I could probably get away with having just one, or salting a bite or two of my eggs and I shouldn't have the same problem that a recovering alcoholic or drug addict will have.  But feeding the craving will just increase the craving.

Eventually, I'm going to have to come up with a better resolution than just pure willpower.  Maybe making the intervals between which I have one of those things I want so much but know aren't good for me lengthy ones would work.  I used to try to limit myself to three bottles (11 ounce) of V-8 per week.  Maybe if I had one every month, or six weeks.  I don't think once a month would harm me, as long as I'm committed to that limit.  Three a week is too much.  Even once a week is too much.

I'm also thinking that I might use that particular thing as a reward.  For every ten pounds I can drop, I'm entitled to one extra bottle of V-8.  Time will tell.  But so far, willpower is winning and that feels damn good.

* * *

I've now heard both sides of the story regarding whether or not Russian President Vladimir Putin stole Robert Kraft's Super Bowl ring.  My belief is that he stole it and that Kraft is now saying he tells the story about the theft as a joke is his way of "needling" Putin.  Putin knows he stole it.  Kraft knows he stole it.  He has no recourse, so he jokes about it.

Does anyone really think that the owner of a football team would give away a Super Bowl ring that was personalized with his name on it?  I sure don't.

* * *

The Pentagon recently released a tally of the military personnel who committed suicide in 2012 and the number they passed out was 349.  A daunting number.  But now it's come to be known that this number was less than accurate.  The real number is 524, which includes the number of reserve and National Guard personnel who were on inactive duty who took their own lives during this time.

The most fascinating number to come from this more detailed look at military suicides is that between 2008 and 2011, 52% of those military members who took their own lives had never been to Afghanistan or Iraq. 

So does this mean that military suicide isn't necessarily a product of the stress of war or protracted deployments?  We don't know.  We do know that there was a two year period where standards were 'relaxed' because it was the only way to meet recruiting goals.  Some of those taken in during this time may have brought their psychological problems with them, rather than those problems being a product of military service.

Military life is difficult, even when not deployed to a combat area.  Long days, frequent separations from loved ones, and the knowledge that you may be called at a moment's notice to go halfway around the world to "fight" is not an easy way to live.  For officers, social events being held by their superiors are even more important than such activities in the corporate world.  Your supervisor holds your career in their hands and can end it with one keystroke on a performance evaluation.  For those trying to advance, a rating of anything other than outstanding can mean you've seen your last promotion.

This is a subject that requires much more study.  Just as I am not a lawyer and don't play one on television, I'm also not a psychiatrist and don't play one on television.  But it doesn't take being one to know that the root causes of these suicides can be identified, and possibly prevented.

* * *

The U.S. Supreme Court has made two interesting, but not surprising rulings.  In one case, it decided that lawyers cannot use personal information from driver license records to solicit clients.  In another, it ruled that a suspect remaining silent before being advised of their Miranda rights can be used against them in court.  In that instance, the suspect was answering some questions but refused to answer one that would have incriminated him.  The court determined that since he was answering some questions, he had chosen to not invoke his right to remain silent.

* * *

This Date in History:

On this date in 1462, Vlad the Impaler attempts to assassinate Mehmed II.
On this date in 1565, Matsunaga Hisahide assassinates the shogun, Ashikaga Yoshiteru.
On this date in 1579, Sir Francis Drake claimed what he called Nova Albion for England (today we know it as California).
On this date in 1631, Mumtaz Mahal dies while giving birth.  Her husband will spend the next 17 years building her mausoleum, the Taj Mahal.
On this date in 1885, the Statue of Liberty arrives in New York Harbor.
On this date in 1939, the last public guillotining in France takes place.
On this date in 1971, President Richard Nixon declares the War on Drugs (we lost).
On this date in 1972, the arrest of five "plumbers" begins the Watergate scandal.
On this date in 1994, the famed "slow-speed chase" takes place, after which O.J. Simpson is arrested.

Famous Folk Born On This Date:

Igor Stravinsky
Ralph Bellamy
Elroy Hirsch
Tigran Petrosian
Newt Gingrich
Barry Manilow
Tommy Franks
George S. Clinton
Lee Tamahori
Joe Piscopo (wish "Sidekicks" was on DVD so I could watch Chuck Norris kick his ass again)
Jello Biafra
Bobby Farrelly
Thomas Haden Church
Greg Kinnear
Erin Murphy
Will Forte
Venus Williams

Movie quotes of the day come from "Trading Places" in honor of it being the late Ralph Bellamy's date of birth:

Randolph Duke: Money isn't everything, Mortimer.
Mortimer Duke: Oh, grow up.
Randolph Duke: Mother always said you were greedy.
Mortimer Duke: She meant it as a compliment.

#2

Billy Ray: When I was growing up, if we wanted a Jacuzzi, we had to fart in the tub.

#3

Billy Ray Valentine: [watches Louis clean his shotgun] You know, you can't just go around and shoot people in the kneecaps with a double-barreled shotgun 'cause you pissed at 'em.
Louis Winthorpe III: Why not?
Billy Ray Valentine: 'Cause it's called assault with a deadly weapon, you get 20 years for that shit.
Louis Winthorpe III: Listen, do you have any better ideas?
Billy Ray Valentine: Yeah. You know, it occurs to me that the best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people.
Coleman: You have to admit, sir, you didn't like it yourself a bit.