Thursday, September 10, 2015

Divorce etiquette

Normally I want nothing to do with anything related to the Kardashians and the Jenners.  But when I couldn't help but notice that Caitlyn Jenner was driven to tears over her exclusion from the high school graduation of her daughter, I had to read up on what happened.

From what I was able to gather without forcing myself to watch either of the reality TV programs involving the Kardashian clan or Caitlyn's reality show, it appears that Kris Jenner chose not to invite Caitlyn to Kylie's high school graduation.  When confronted by Caitlyn over this, Kris made excuses, saying she was still hurting over the Vanity Fair article on Caitlyn's decision to transition.  That's bullshit.  Then she made a comment about how people who divorce don't always do everything together.

There is some truth in that.  But you don't exclude one of a child's two parents from their high school graduation.  My parents split up and finalized their divorce in 1971.  My mother and father, and my father's third wife were all at my graduation (along with grandparents, aunt and my siblings).  There was no way in hell one of my parents would have refused to invite the other.  On the night I graduated, and when my sister graduated, and when my brother graduated, we dined as a family.  In fact, for the graduations of my siblings, we went to the same restaurant (which no longer exists).  It was a family thing.  My parents never excluded one another from the lives of their children.

The pettiness of excluding Caitlyn from the graduation of her daughter because her ex-wife has hurt feelings over the difficult decision Caitlyn made borders on being reprehensible.  You can't get that occasion back again.  You can't make up for such a slight.

A husband and wife (or a wife and wife, or a husband and husband) may split, but if they brought children into the world, they will always be bonded together as parents.  The only good news is that there aren't many future events where it will be Kris choosing to exclude Caitlyn.