There's a moment of clarity...

when you come close to crossing over.  It is easy to toss around phrases like "near-death experience" and "seeing the bright white light".  But unless you've been there and experienced it, you'll never truly understand what it is like.  On occasion I'm able to be somewhat adept with words but I couldn't begin to describe that moment to allow you to experience what I experienced.  I wouldn't wish it on anyone either.  Even with the clarity that moment provides, it isn't something that anyone should want to go through.

I will borrow a concept and maybe a phrase or two from some fiction authors I read long ago that offer some insight though.  One described another person witnessing someone who returned from the "brink" as experiencing senses at a level of awareness that the returnee had never before or would experience again.  Another author described a "moment of ultimate insight" as making time seem to almost stand still.  This author said that moment was worth a hundred lifetimes of ordinary consciousness.

The one concept I can properly articulate and communicate is that it makes you understand just how precious life truly is.  One minute it's there and the next it's gone.  I've seen that in others, when they've been alive one moment and died the next.  Hold on to life.  Fight for life.  Struggle with every breath, with every heartbeat.

* * * * *

Yesterday I was completely and utterly exhausted.  I spent six hours engaged in something on Saturday and as a result it wore me out.  I guess I have to accept that my level of stamina has decreased in some ways since I got out of the hospital.  I can honestly say that I am still ahead of where I was when I got out of the hospital, but I have backslid some from where I was somewhere between then and now.

And that's okay.  Life isn't a steady progression forward in terms of getting better at things.  There are steps forward and steps backward.  When you're training for a road race and you miss a training run you don't stop training.  You go back out there for the next scheduled training run.  You can't make up for the backward steps.  You just go on, doing the best you can. 

I don't know if I've mentioned her before, but there's this woman.  Her name is Tawni Gomes.  Years ago, when Oprah found Bob Greene, her diet and exercise guru (and was running half-marathons and one marathon), she had him on her show.  Tawni was on a business trip at the time and weighed over 300 pounds.  She saw that epiosode and went out and bought Bob's book.  That sent her on a journey that led to her losing half her body weight, running marathons and triathalons.  She also wrote her own book.  "No More Excuses".  It's a great read.  Especially if you're where I am at the moment, feeling like I've lost my way on the path toward getting better.

So the things I'm pondering this morning aside from those two minor issues above are:

Why are dog-sharing groups popping up?  The idea of "I will watch your dog when needed if you'll watch mine" is neat, but watching someone else's dog as sort of a 'test-drive' isn't smart.  The dog you're test-driving won't be the dog you get. 

Why do people wear socks or stocking when they're wearing sandals?  Isn't the attraction of a sandal that you have a shoe on without having to wear a sock?

If the State of California is going to outlaw adding a service charge or surcharge for a customer's use of a credit card, why don't they also outlaw the concept of credit price with a cash discount?  The net effect is the same as allowing a credit card surcharge.

Obamacare's official name is the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, but it doesn't do a single thing to lower the premiums private insurers are charging.  Blue Cross in CA is raising premiums an average of 26%.  Doesn't sound more affordable to me.  Especially if you're earning more than 400% of the poverty level annually, which makes you ineligible for those government subsidies to help offset premium costs.

If the cereal "Lucky Charms" really worked, wouldn't it be a favorite of gamblers?  If there was an element of luck, wouldn't real four-leaf clovers be on sale in Las Vegas on every street corner?

Why is it that when two people break a wishbone the one holding the larger portion after it breaks is supposed to get their wish?  Why is that piece endowed with power and the other piece has none?  It's a wishbone, not a wishbone portion.

How long did the city government of a town in Vermont know a woman had between 30 and 40 pot-bellied pigs as pets before ordering her to get rid of them?  I wonder if she ever served herself a slice of ham, or some pieces of bacon.

Why in the world would someone writing an article on ten tax tips for 2013 make one of them to find a tax professional?  That's not a tip.  That's marketing.

We have two aphorisms.  "Many hands make light work" and "Too many cooks spoil the soup".  Aren't they conflicting?

Who cares why the chicken crossed the road?  It isn't like the chicken told anyone.

This Date in History:

On this date in 1325, Alfonso IV becomes King of Portugal.
On this date in 1558, France takes Calais, England's last possession on the continent.
On this date in 1598, Boris Godunov becomes Czar of Russia (guess he was good enough after all).
On this date in 1782, the first commercial bank in the U.S., the Bank of North America opens.
On this date in 1904, the distress signal is established as CQD, only to be replaced by SOS two years later.
On this date in 1920, the New York state assembly refuses to seat five Socialsts who were duly elected to the body.
On this date in 1927, the first Transatlantic phone service is established from New York City to London.
On this date in 1931, Guy Menzies makes the first non-stop trans-Tasman (from Australia to New Zealand) flight.
On this date in 1945, Britain's Field Marshal Montgomery holds a press conference where he takes credit for the victory of Allied forces in the Battle of the Bulge. (liar)
On this date in 1959, the U.S. officially recognizes the government of Fidel Castro.
On this date in 1980, President Carter signs a bill giving $1.5 billion in loans to bail out Chrysler.
On this date in 1990, the inside of the Leaning Tower of Pisa is closed due to safety concerns.
On this date in 1999, the Senate Impeachment trial of President Bill Clinton begins.
And on this date in 1952, actor/martial-artist Sammo Hung is born.  While he did have a short-lived TV series in the U.S., he's probably best known for getting pummeled by Bruce Lee in the opening scene of the most famous martial-arts movie ever "Enter the Dragon".