Suggested replacement epitaphs for some famous folk

(I know, this is a bit of twisted humor but I felt the need)

Richard M. Nixon - "Where did I leave that 18 minutes of tape?"

John F. Kennedy - "That was a really good speech I never got to give"

Ronald Reagan - "To heck with astrology, Mommy, I want to go to Russia again"

DeForest Kelley - "I'm dead, Jim."

Abraham Lincoln - "How did the play end?"

Franklin Delano Roosevelt - "If you gotta go, that was the way to go" (based on rumors that he died while having sex).

Norman Schwarzkopf - "Temper?  What temper?"

Jack Klugman - "I wasn't a slob"

Robert Bork - "My name should not have become a verb"

Reverend Sun Myung Moon - "Matchmaker hell, I made way more matches"

Henry Hill - "It was all Jimmy's fault.  Otherwise I'd have never ratted"

Donna Summer - "I did work hard for the money"

Donald "Duck" Dunn - "Who'd want to turn goat piss into anything?"

Dick Clark - "Who was that Dorian Gray guy anyway?"

Don Cornelius - "Actually I really liked Barry Manilow's music"

Desi Arnaz - "Babaloooooooooooooooooooooo"

Don Corleone - "Okay, okay, Santino WAS a bad "Don""

John Belushi - "Who really did bomb Pearl Harbor if it wasn't the Germans?"

John Wayne - "I did not call that many people 'pilgrim'"

Jeffrey Dahmer - "The Brutal Gourmet"

Jack Webb - "No more facts, give me some fiction"

Noriyuki "Pat" Morita - "Man who catch fly with chopsticks should wash chopsticks before eating"