Will someone please explain...

when Tuesdays became "Taco Tuesdays"?  I hear this all the time and I don't know why Tuesdays are suddenly taco day.  Heck, the dining room is serving tacos for lunch today, which means I'll be picking something else up for lunch unless the alternative choice is palatable.  Now I wish there was a Souplantation close by.  There's one in the Marina, but that shopping center is undergoing major renovations so it might be closed.

Yes, I walked today.  To the far side of the mosque.  That was enough for today.  I was out walking for 35 or 36 minutes, less the two or three that I sat on a bench, re-tying my shoelaces.  Everyone says that you will step on a shoelace and trip yourself, but I'd walked a long way before finally deciding I needed to stop down and tie the darn thing.  Why is it that when one shoelace comes undone, you automatically re-tie the other one, as a "just in case"?

That started me wondering about some of life's absurdities.  Words that have gone from nouns to verbs.  Friend for example.  "Friend me on Facebook" is a common phrase.  And with the advent of friend as a verb, we got unfriend.  Before, the closest I ever came to thinking of someone as an unfriend was in thinking of enemies.  You don't say or think "well, he's not my friend, so he must be my unfriend."  When we started "liking" things as an action, we got "unlike".  I liked my second wife prior to our split.  I didn't "unlike" her when we split.  I just stopped liking her.

Then there are certain professionals and professions.  Drivers drive.  Musicians play.  CEOs sit in offices and run companies.  But doctors, lawyers, accountant and others "practice".  Call me crazy, but if a doctor is going to treat me, I'd prefer if he's beyond the practice stage and actually has his craft down pat.  I watched some ER re-runs on DVD last night and in one, the patient's grandmother was running around like a madwoman before surgery yelling "don't let any residents operate on my grandson".  Practice might make perfect, but I like perfection when it comes to my health, my legal issues or my accounting, which I handle myself.  Then again, when I had a big book of clients who depended on me to do their taxes, did they represent my "practice"?

I got into a car yesterday.  When we arrived at the destination, I got out.  That is not the act of de-carring.  We don't decar, we don't debus (although we do debug computer programs), we don't deship or deboat, but when we get off of an airplane, we do deplane.  Why?  Because some short guy on a TV show most young people have never heard of used to yell "Boss, De Plane, De Plane" before the start of theprogram?  No, because some moron came up with deplane not long after planes started carrying passengers.  Back when flight attendants were all female, called stewardesses and were all under the age of 32.  Mental note:  Look for a copy of "Coffee Tea, or Me" next time I go to the used bookstore.

Okay, on to the topic of cognitive dysfunction and politics.  Now let me preface this by saying I reside in a living laboratory of cognitive dysfunction.  I watch the mental health, memories, and abilities of people fade all around me.  The other day one of the residents asked me if we'd already eaten lunch.  It was 10:30 in the morning and of course we hadn't.  "No, we haven't, it's only 10:30".  "Oh, I can't see the clock from here."  "Uh, you're wearing your watch."  "Oh, I can't see that either, without my glasses."  "Where are your glasses?"  "In my purse."  "So put them on."  "Oh, that's a good idea.  Oh my, it is only 10:30.  Not time for lunch yet."  That particular woman makes notes all day long of everything happening around her, in an effort to stay informed, but the word is that she can't even read her own notes most of the time. 

Paul Ryan and Todd Akin said some stupid stuff.  But they said it simply because they were trying to dance around answering a question that was designed to get them to go on the record with a position on abortion that they know is unpopular.  They hold the view that abortion is never appropriate, even in cases of rape and incest.  They should have just said that.  Instead they danced, and dancing is bad, particularly when there's no music.

Politicians try to dance away from going on the record with things they don't want to say.  In 1987, I tried to get Pat Robertson to admit, on the record, that he hadn't formally announced his candidacy for the Republican nomination to run for President because it would mean complying with the Equal Time Doctrine.  He danced.  He said dumb shit.

But when I tried to get the late Jeanne Kirkpatrick to say something on the record that was a position she didn't want to take, she managed to dance without saying anything that wasn't erudite, cogent and on point. 

On the other hand, Joe Biden apparently doesn't stay on script, and that's his "in vito veritas" moment, and when it happens, it's illustrative that something not totally right upstairs.  You don't not listen to what you say when you say it.  When you hear yourself making a verbal gaffe, like saying "jobs" is a three-letter word, and then when you count the letters, you realize that J-O-B-S is actually four letters and you correct yourself.  He didn't  That says something about his brain function, attention span, or something else that's equally disturbing.

I'll give President Obama a pass on "57 states".  But he went on the Today show and said "we won Michigan", referring to the Michigan primary where he wasn't even on the ballot.  You can't win if you don't run, and the interviewer gave him a pass on this, failing to point out the error.  If you're running for the Presidency, not knowing which primaries you're entered into is not a sign of brilliance, awareness, or even self-awareness.

I don't worry that Obama's faculties are going.  I don't worry that Akin's faculties or Ryan's faculties are going.  The first is dishonest, a promise-breaker and so on, but he's fine otherwise.  Akin and Ryan are dumb for not saying what they mean, or being better prepared for what they need to say to dance around question they don't want to answer, so they don't look as dumb as they are.

But there's something worrysome about Joe Biden.