The art of the question
The Boy Scout motto is of course, "Be Prepared" and it's a good motto. In fact, it should be the motto of those who consider themselves to be journalists. Why? Because whenever you're presented with an opportunity to question a newsmaker, you need to have a good question ready. When I'm going to be doing an interview, I sit down in advance and write out all of the questions I can think of. I never get to ask all of them, so I try to organize them so that I'm asking those I consider most important at the outset. That's been my process after I did one of my earliest interviews and wasn't fully prepared.
Because of this, I admire those who ask the good questions, the tough questions, the questions that people don't like to answer. I applaud ESPN's Quint Kessich for asking Michigan State football coach Mark Dantonio about his "clock management" at halftime of the MSU v Northwestern game yesterday. He asked a tough question and the coach ducked it because he didn't want to admit he'd made a mistake. The mistake didn't matter in the overall result of the game, but it was still an excellent question.
Sometimes it isn't the quality of the question that is posed, but the answer that it elicits. A reporter once asked Betty Ford if she thought her kids used marijuana. Most of the other reporters there thought it was a bad question. A wasted question. Right up until the moment when she said "yes" and then it became a brilliant question. Rather than the expected "no", her answer ignited discussion about marijuana use. Another great example of the question that doesn't seem too bright until you hear the response was asked by someone I used to know. It was very early in Paul Olden's career in broadcasting when he asked Tommy Lasorda about Lasorda's opinion about something following a Dodgers loss. Here's the question and Lasorda's answer. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIwrYH6Urbs
When it comes to politics, the best journalists ask the tough questions, even when their political leanings might otherwise make them sympathetic to the person they are questioning.
We need our news gathers to keep asking the hard questions.
* * *
The Swiss have voted not to impose a limit on CEO pay. The proposal was to limit what a CEO is paid to an amount equal to 12 times what the company's lowest paid employee receives. That got me to thinking about this concept again.
The President of USC earns $1.4 million in total compensation. I'm guessing the lowest paid employee (excluding part-time employees) isn't earning more than $15 per hour in salary and at most, $20 per hour in total compensation (including health and retirement benefits). Let's be generous and round up to $50,000. That would limit the president's compensation to $600,000 a year. Considering that the president of USC is in charge of an institution that generates nearly $3.6 billion in gross receipts annually while employing over 15,000 people, $600,000 seems a low wage. Then again, USC is a private university. I'm of the mind that a privately held business should be able to pay its employees what it wants to. A medical doctor and a billing specialist in a hospital both work a full-time week and in fact the doctor may well earn more than the hospital's CEO. But the value of the labor provided by that doctor and that billing specialist to the hospital's success aren't equal. We'd like to think it is, but it isn't.
Oracle co-founder and CEO Larry Ellison was paid over $96 million in 2012. He tops the list of the 100 highest paid CEOs prepared by the AFL-CIO. There are over 100,000 employees working for Oracle. Even if the calculation was changed so that the CEO could earn 20 times what the company's lowest paid employee makes, his salary would be limited to $10 million per year. Considering that his company earned $3.5 billion in net income in 2012, I think the shareholders are happy with his performance. Then again, he does own around 23% of the company personally.
The shareholders of a publicly held company should be the ones who decide if that company's CEO and other employees are overpaid. It's their money at risk.
Here is what we can do that would influence this situation. First, we need to change the rules on something called the carried interest rule. This is the loophole that hedge fund managers use to avoid literally billions of dollars in income taxes. In 2011, the 40th highest paid hedge fund managers earned over $13 billion between them. Assuming it was all subject to ordinary income taxation, the tax bill would have been 35%. Because of the carried interest rule, that $13 billion was taxed at only 15%. That means that this group avoided paying $2.6 billion in income tax they should have paid if they weren't given a special break. The justification for this special break is an exercise in pretzel logic.
Next we have to alter the rules on stock options. The stock options that CEOs and many people up and down the "food chain" of a corporation come with a tax advantage. They are compensation that isn't taxed as income. It winds up being taxed as a capital gain. So if they hold the option for one year after exercising it, the top rate of taxation on it is only 15%. Once again, up to 20% in income tax is being avoided.
I don't propose to eliminate this break completely. My proposal is that the first $100,000 realized in any year from these ISO (incentive stock options) grants is taxed as a capital gain. But any amount realized above that amount realized from an ISO should be taxed at the person's normal income tax rate, just like wages. Why should stock options given as compensation be treated differently than wages given as compensation? If someone can give me a good answer, I'll reconsider.
* * *
Random Ponderings:
I saw four groups of people lined up outside of Best Buy today (I passed it on the way to the market). One group had pitched a tent. They'll be there until Friday. How much will the items they purchase after spending days out in the elements save them over what they could have paid a few days later, or right before Christmas? Not enough to justify what they're doing in terms of lost time and inconvenience, in my mind.
The fans who are bitching because the St. Louis Cardinals just tripled the salary of PED user Jhonny Peralta need to look in the mirror rather than blaming management for encouraging the use of PEDs. The fact is that fans put ownership and management under more pressure to deliver winning teams than anyone else. Fan interest drives revenues and profits. Win and earn. Lose and lose. What would be the incentive of the owners to band together and refuse to compete for Peralta's services as a player? You want to create a disincentive to stop players from using PEDs. Suspend and fine them for a full season for the first offense and then limit them to the major league minimum for two seasons thereafter.
Yahoo does it again. Look at this excerpt from their article about how the new film "Hunger Games: Catching Fire": The next installments of the series based on author Suzanne Collins’ best-selling young-adult trilogy– “Mockingjay Part 1” and “Mockingjay Part 2” – are set for release in November of 2014 and 2015. The studio has launched a massive global merchandising campaign around around Katniss and Co., and has even talked “Hunger Games” theme parks. As much money as they make, you'd think they could afford a couple of editors. Maybe the author of the piece was listening to this when they wrote it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leohcvmf8kM They go "around and around" too.
The rest of Fleetwood Mac should just ask Christine McVie to rejoin the band already. She says she wants to.
Is anyone surprised that Paula Deen and Miley Cyrus joined Dennis Rodman and disgraced member of Congress Anthony "I text my" Weiner on GQ's Least Influential Celebrity list? I'm not.
Now that Amy Robach has been learned she had a second, undetected malignancy, I bet she's even more grateful she got the assignment to go out and get a mammogram and report on it.
* * *
November 24th in History:
380 – Theodosius I makes his adventus, or formal entry, into Constantinople.
1227 – Polish Prince Leszek I the White is assassinated at an assembly of Piast dukes at Gąsawa.
1248 – In the middle of the night a mass on the north side of Mont Granier suddenly collapsed, in one of the largest historical rockslope failures known in Europe.
1429 – Joan of Arc unsuccessfully besieges La Charité.
1542 – Battle of Solway Moss: An English army defeats a much larger Scottish force near the River Esk in Dumfries and Galloway.
1642 – Abel Tasman becomes the first European to discover the island Van Diemen's Land (later renamed Tasmania).
1835 – The Texas Provincial Government authorizes the creation of a horse-mounted police force called the Texas Rangers (which is now the Texas Ranger Division of the Texas Department of Public Safety).
1850 – Danish troops defeat a Schleswig-Holstein force in the town of Lottorf, Schleswig-Holstein.
1859 – Charles Darwin publishes On the Origin of Species, the anniversary of which is sometimes called "Evolution Day"
1863 – American Civil War: Battle of Lookout Mountain – Near Chattanooga, Tennessee, Union forces under General Ulysses S. Grant capture Lookout Mountain and begin to break the Confederate siege of the city led by General Braxton Bragg.
1906 – A 13-6 victory by the Massillon Tigers over their rivals, the Canton Bulldogs, for the "Ohio League" Championship, leads to accusations that the championship series was fixed and results in the first major scandal in professional American football.
1922 – Nine Irish Republican Army members are executed by an Irish Free State firing squad. Among them is author Robert Erskine Childers, who had been arrested for illegally carrying a revolver.
1932 – In Washington, D.C., the FBI Scientific Crime Detection Laboratory (better known as the FBI Crime Lab) officially opens.
1935 – The Senegalese Socialist Party holds its second congress.
1940 – World War II: The First Slovak Republic becomes a signatory to the Tripartite Pact, officially joining the Axis powers.
1941 – World War II: The United States grants Lend-Lease to the Free French.
1943 – World War II: The USS Liscome Bay is torpedoed near Tarawa and sinks, killing 650 men.
1944 – World War II: Bombing of Tokyo – The first bombing raid against the Japanese capital from the east and by land is carried out by 88 American aircraft.
1950 – The "Storm of the Century", a violent snowstorm, takes shape on this date before paralyzing the northeastern United States and the Appalachians the next day, bringing winds up to 100 mph and sub-zero temperatures. Pickens, West Virginia, records 57 inches of snow. 353 people would die as a result of the storm.
1962 – The West Berlin branch of the Socialist Unity Party of Germany forms a separate party, the Socialist Unity Party of West Berlin.
1962 – The influential British satirical television programme That Was the Week That Was is first broadcast.
1963 – Lee Harvey Oswald, the alleged assassin of President John F. Kennedy, is murdered two days after the assassination, by Jack Ruby in the basement of Dallas police department headquarters. The shooting happens to be broadcast live on television.
1963 – Vietnam War: Newly sworn-in U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson confirms that the United States intends to continue supporting South Vietnam both militarily and economically.
1965 – Joseph-Désiré Mobutu seizes power in the Democratic Republic of the Congo and becomes President; he rules the country (which he renames Zaire in 1971) for over 30 years, until being overthrown by rebels in 1997.
1966 – Bulgarian TABSO Flight 101 crashes near Bratislava, Czechoslovakia, killing all 82 people on board.
1969 – Apollo program: The Apollo 12 command module splashes down safely in the Pacific Ocean, ending the second manned mission to land on the Moon.
1971 – During a severe thunderstorm over Washington state, a hijacker calling himself Dan Cooper (aka D. B. Cooper) parachutes from a Northwest Orient Airlines plane with $200,000 in ransom money. He has never been found.
1973 – A national speed limit is imposed on the Autobahn in Germany because of the 1973 oil crisis. The speed limit lasted only four months.
1974 – Donald Johanson and Tom Gray discover the 40% complete Australopithecus afarensis skeleton, nicknamed "Lucy" (after The Beatles song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds"), in the Awash Valley of Ethiopia's Afar Depression.
1976 – The 1976 Çaldıran-Muradiye earthquake in eastern Turkey kills between 4,000 and 5,000 people.
2012 – A fire at a clothing factory in Dhaka, Bangladesh, kills at least 112 people.
Famous Folk Born on November 24th:
Charles XI of Sweden
Father Junipero Serra
Alexander Suvorov
Zachary Taylor (the general and president of the U. S., not my close friend who I served with during three of my duty assignments in the Air Force)
Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
Scott Joplin
Alben W. Barkley
Dale Carnegie
Charles "Lucky" Luciano
Garson Kanin
Barbara Sheldon
Howard Duff
John Lindsay (the inspiration for Mayor Linseed on the old TV series version of "Batman")
Ron Dellums
Oscar Robertson (only NBA player to ever average a triple-double for a season)
Paul Tagliabue
Pete Best
Donald "Duck" Dunn (RIP, you were an amazing musical talent)
Ted Bundy
Dwight Schultz
Steve Yeager
Linda Tripp (don't tell her anything you want to be kept confidential)
Denise Crosby (wonder if she regrets the choice to leave ST:TNG?)
Garret Dillahunt
Colin Hanks
Katherine Heigl
Movie quotes today come from "Knocked Up" since it is Katherine Heigl's birthday:
Alison Scott: [to Debbie] What do you think? He's funny, right?
Ben Stone: [to Debbie's kids] Fetch!
Debbie: [to Alison] He's playing fetch... with my kids... he's treating my kids like they're dogs.
#2
Debbie: I'm not gonna go to the end of the fucking line, who the fuck are you? I have just as much of a right to be here as any of these little skanky girls. What, am I not skanky enough for you, you want me to hike up my fucking skirt? What the fuck is your problem? I'm not going anywhere, you're just some roided out freak with a fucking clipboard. And your stupid little fucking rope! You know what, you may have power now but you are not god. You're a doorman, okay. You're a doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, so... Fuck You! You fucking fag with your fucking little faggy gloves.
Doorman: I know... you're right. I'm so sorry, I fuckin' hate this job. I don't want to be the one to pass judgement, decide who gets in. Shit makes me sick to my stomach, I get the runs from the stress. It's not cause you're not hot, I would love to tap that ass. I would tear that ass up. I can't let you in cause you're old as fuck. For this club, you know, not for the earth.
Debbie: What?
Doorman: You old, she pregnant. Can't have a bunch of old pregnant bitches running around. That's crazy, I'm only allowed to let in five percent black people. He said that, that means if there's 25 people here I get to let in one and a quarter black people. So I gotta hope there's a black midget in the crowd.
#3
Alison Scott: I was drunk!
Ben Stone: Was your vagina drunk?
#4
Ben Stone: Hey Doc Howard, Ben Stone calling, guess what the fuck's up? Allison is going into labor and you are not fucking here, you know where you're at? Your at a fucking bar mitzvah in San Francisco you motherfucking piece of shit, and you know what I'm gonna have to do now? I'm going have to kill you, I'm gonna pop a fucking cap in your ass. You're dead, you're Tupac, you are fucking Biggie you piece of shit, I hope you fucking die or drop the chair and kill that fucking kid... I hope your plane crashes, peace fucker!
Because of this, I admire those who ask the good questions, the tough questions, the questions that people don't like to answer. I applaud ESPN's Quint Kessich for asking Michigan State football coach Mark Dantonio about his "clock management" at halftime of the MSU v Northwestern game yesterday. He asked a tough question and the coach ducked it because he didn't want to admit he'd made a mistake. The mistake didn't matter in the overall result of the game, but it was still an excellent question.
Sometimes it isn't the quality of the question that is posed, but the answer that it elicits. A reporter once asked Betty Ford if she thought her kids used marijuana. Most of the other reporters there thought it was a bad question. A wasted question. Right up until the moment when she said "yes" and then it became a brilliant question. Rather than the expected "no", her answer ignited discussion about marijuana use. Another great example of the question that doesn't seem too bright until you hear the response was asked by someone I used to know. It was very early in Paul Olden's career in broadcasting when he asked Tommy Lasorda about Lasorda's opinion about something following a Dodgers loss. Here's the question and Lasorda's answer. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIwrYH6Urbs
When it comes to politics, the best journalists ask the tough questions, even when their political leanings might otherwise make them sympathetic to the person they are questioning.
We need our news gathers to keep asking the hard questions.
* * *
The Swiss have voted not to impose a limit on CEO pay. The proposal was to limit what a CEO is paid to an amount equal to 12 times what the company's lowest paid employee receives. That got me to thinking about this concept again.
The President of USC earns $1.4 million in total compensation. I'm guessing the lowest paid employee (excluding part-time employees) isn't earning more than $15 per hour in salary and at most, $20 per hour in total compensation (including health and retirement benefits). Let's be generous and round up to $50,000. That would limit the president's compensation to $600,000 a year. Considering that the president of USC is in charge of an institution that generates nearly $3.6 billion in gross receipts annually while employing over 15,000 people, $600,000 seems a low wage. Then again, USC is a private university. I'm of the mind that a privately held business should be able to pay its employees what it wants to. A medical doctor and a billing specialist in a hospital both work a full-time week and in fact the doctor may well earn more than the hospital's CEO. But the value of the labor provided by that doctor and that billing specialist to the hospital's success aren't equal. We'd like to think it is, but it isn't.
Oracle co-founder and CEO Larry Ellison was paid over $96 million in 2012. He tops the list of the 100 highest paid CEOs prepared by the AFL-CIO. There are over 100,000 employees working for Oracle. Even if the calculation was changed so that the CEO could earn 20 times what the company's lowest paid employee makes, his salary would be limited to $10 million per year. Considering that his company earned $3.5 billion in net income in 2012, I think the shareholders are happy with his performance. Then again, he does own around 23% of the company personally.
The shareholders of a publicly held company should be the ones who decide if that company's CEO and other employees are overpaid. It's their money at risk.
Here is what we can do that would influence this situation. First, we need to change the rules on something called the carried interest rule. This is the loophole that hedge fund managers use to avoid literally billions of dollars in income taxes. In 2011, the 40th highest paid hedge fund managers earned over $13 billion between them. Assuming it was all subject to ordinary income taxation, the tax bill would have been 35%. Because of the carried interest rule, that $13 billion was taxed at only 15%. That means that this group avoided paying $2.6 billion in income tax they should have paid if they weren't given a special break. The justification for this special break is an exercise in pretzel logic.
Next we have to alter the rules on stock options. The stock options that CEOs and many people up and down the "food chain" of a corporation come with a tax advantage. They are compensation that isn't taxed as income. It winds up being taxed as a capital gain. So if they hold the option for one year after exercising it, the top rate of taxation on it is only 15%. Once again, up to 20% in income tax is being avoided.
I don't propose to eliminate this break completely. My proposal is that the first $100,000 realized in any year from these ISO (incentive stock options) grants is taxed as a capital gain. But any amount realized above that amount realized from an ISO should be taxed at the person's normal income tax rate, just like wages. Why should stock options given as compensation be treated differently than wages given as compensation? If someone can give me a good answer, I'll reconsider.
* * *
Random Ponderings:
I saw four groups of people lined up outside of Best Buy today (I passed it on the way to the market). One group had pitched a tent. They'll be there until Friday. How much will the items they purchase after spending days out in the elements save them over what they could have paid a few days later, or right before Christmas? Not enough to justify what they're doing in terms of lost time and inconvenience, in my mind.
The fans who are bitching because the St. Louis Cardinals just tripled the salary of PED user Jhonny Peralta need to look in the mirror rather than blaming management for encouraging the use of PEDs. The fact is that fans put ownership and management under more pressure to deliver winning teams than anyone else. Fan interest drives revenues and profits. Win and earn. Lose and lose. What would be the incentive of the owners to band together and refuse to compete for Peralta's services as a player? You want to create a disincentive to stop players from using PEDs. Suspend and fine them for a full season for the first offense and then limit them to the major league minimum for two seasons thereafter.
Yahoo does it again. Look at this excerpt from their article about how the new film "Hunger Games: Catching Fire": The next installments of the series based on author Suzanne Collins’ best-selling young-adult trilogy– “Mockingjay Part 1” and “Mockingjay Part 2” – are set for release in November of 2014 and 2015. The studio has launched a massive global merchandising campaign around around Katniss and Co., and has even talked “Hunger Games” theme parks. As much money as they make, you'd think they could afford a couple of editors. Maybe the author of the piece was listening to this when they wrote it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leohcvmf8kM They go "around and around" too.
The rest of Fleetwood Mac should just ask Christine McVie to rejoin the band already. She says she wants to.
Is anyone surprised that Paula Deen and Miley Cyrus joined Dennis Rodman and disgraced member of Congress Anthony "I text my" Weiner on GQ's Least Influential Celebrity list? I'm not.
Now that Amy Robach has been learned she had a second, undetected malignancy, I bet she's even more grateful she got the assignment to go out and get a mammogram and report on it.
* * *
November 24th in History:
380 – Theodosius I makes his adventus, or formal entry, into Constantinople.
1227 – Polish Prince Leszek I the White is assassinated at an assembly of Piast dukes at Gąsawa.
1248 – In the middle of the night a mass on the north side of Mont Granier suddenly collapsed, in one of the largest historical rockslope failures known in Europe.
1429 – Joan of Arc unsuccessfully besieges La Charité.
1542 – Battle of Solway Moss: An English army defeats a much larger Scottish force near the River Esk in Dumfries and Galloway.
1642 – Abel Tasman becomes the first European to discover the island Van Diemen's Land (later renamed Tasmania).
1835 – The Texas Provincial Government authorizes the creation of a horse-mounted police force called the Texas Rangers (which is now the Texas Ranger Division of the Texas Department of Public Safety).
1850 – Danish troops defeat a Schleswig-Holstein force in the town of Lottorf, Schleswig-Holstein.
1859 – Charles Darwin publishes On the Origin of Species, the anniversary of which is sometimes called "Evolution Day"
1863 – American Civil War: Battle of Lookout Mountain – Near Chattanooga, Tennessee, Union forces under General Ulysses S. Grant capture Lookout Mountain and begin to break the Confederate siege of the city led by General Braxton Bragg.
1906 – A 13-6 victory by the Massillon Tigers over their rivals, the Canton Bulldogs, for the "Ohio League" Championship, leads to accusations that the championship series was fixed and results in the first major scandal in professional American football.
1922 – Nine Irish Republican Army members are executed by an Irish Free State firing squad. Among them is author Robert Erskine Childers, who had been arrested for illegally carrying a revolver.
1932 – In Washington, D.C., the FBI Scientific Crime Detection Laboratory (better known as the FBI Crime Lab) officially opens.
1935 – The Senegalese Socialist Party holds its second congress.
1940 – World War II: The First Slovak Republic becomes a signatory to the Tripartite Pact, officially joining the Axis powers.
1941 – World War II: The United States grants Lend-Lease to the Free French.
1943 – World War II: The USS Liscome Bay is torpedoed near Tarawa and sinks, killing 650 men.
1944 – World War II: Bombing of Tokyo – The first bombing raid against the Japanese capital from the east and by land is carried out by 88 American aircraft.
1950 – The "Storm of the Century", a violent snowstorm, takes shape on this date before paralyzing the northeastern United States and the Appalachians the next day, bringing winds up to 100 mph and sub-zero temperatures. Pickens, West Virginia, records 57 inches of snow. 353 people would die as a result of the storm.
1962 – The West Berlin branch of the Socialist Unity Party of Germany forms a separate party, the Socialist Unity Party of West Berlin.
1962 – The influential British satirical television programme That Was the Week That Was is first broadcast.
1963 – Lee Harvey Oswald, the alleged assassin of President John F. Kennedy, is murdered two days after the assassination, by Jack Ruby in the basement of Dallas police department headquarters. The shooting happens to be broadcast live on television.
1963 – Vietnam War: Newly sworn-in U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson confirms that the United States intends to continue supporting South Vietnam both militarily and economically.
1965 – Joseph-Désiré Mobutu seizes power in the Democratic Republic of the Congo and becomes President; he rules the country (which he renames Zaire in 1971) for over 30 years, until being overthrown by rebels in 1997.
1966 – Bulgarian TABSO Flight 101 crashes near Bratislava, Czechoslovakia, killing all 82 people on board.
1969 – Apollo program: The Apollo 12 command module splashes down safely in the Pacific Ocean, ending the second manned mission to land on the Moon.
1971 – During a severe thunderstorm over Washington state, a hijacker calling himself Dan Cooper (aka D. B. Cooper) parachutes from a Northwest Orient Airlines plane with $200,000 in ransom money. He has never been found.
1973 – A national speed limit is imposed on the Autobahn in Germany because of the 1973 oil crisis. The speed limit lasted only four months.
1974 – Donald Johanson and Tom Gray discover the 40% complete Australopithecus afarensis skeleton, nicknamed "Lucy" (after The Beatles song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds"), in the Awash Valley of Ethiopia's Afar Depression.
1976 – The 1976 Çaldıran-Muradiye earthquake in eastern Turkey kills between 4,000 and 5,000 people.
2012 – A fire at a clothing factory in Dhaka, Bangladesh, kills at least 112 people.
Famous Folk Born on November 24th:
Charles XI of Sweden
Father Junipero Serra
Alexander Suvorov
Zachary Taylor (the general and president of the U. S., not my close friend who I served with during three of my duty assignments in the Air Force)
Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
Scott Joplin
Alben W. Barkley
Dale Carnegie
Charles "Lucky" Luciano
Garson Kanin
Barbara Sheldon
Howard Duff
John Lindsay (the inspiration for Mayor Linseed on the old TV series version of "Batman")
Ron Dellums
Oscar Robertson (only NBA player to ever average a triple-double for a season)
Paul Tagliabue
Pete Best
Donald "Duck" Dunn (RIP, you were an amazing musical talent)
Ted Bundy
Dwight Schultz
Steve Yeager
Linda Tripp (don't tell her anything you want to be kept confidential)
Denise Crosby (wonder if she regrets the choice to leave ST:TNG?)
Garret Dillahunt
Colin Hanks
Katherine Heigl
Movie quotes today come from "Knocked Up" since it is Katherine Heigl's birthday:
Alison Scott: [to Debbie] What do you think? He's funny, right?
Ben Stone: [to Debbie's kids] Fetch!
Debbie: [to Alison] He's playing fetch... with my kids... he's treating my kids like they're dogs.
#2
Debbie: I'm not gonna go to the end of the fucking line, who the fuck are you? I have just as much of a right to be here as any of these little skanky girls. What, am I not skanky enough for you, you want me to hike up my fucking skirt? What the fuck is your problem? I'm not going anywhere, you're just some roided out freak with a fucking clipboard. And your stupid little fucking rope! You know what, you may have power now but you are not god. You're a doorman, okay. You're a doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, so... Fuck You! You fucking fag with your fucking little faggy gloves.
Doorman: I know... you're right. I'm so sorry, I fuckin' hate this job. I don't want to be the one to pass judgement, decide who gets in. Shit makes me sick to my stomach, I get the runs from the stress. It's not cause you're not hot, I would love to tap that ass. I would tear that ass up. I can't let you in cause you're old as fuck. For this club, you know, not for the earth.
Debbie: What?
Doorman: You old, she pregnant. Can't have a bunch of old pregnant bitches running around. That's crazy, I'm only allowed to let in five percent black people. He said that, that means if there's 25 people here I get to let in one and a quarter black people. So I gotta hope there's a black midget in the crowd.
#3
Alison Scott: I was drunk!
Ben Stone: Was your vagina drunk?
#4
Ben Stone: Hey Doc Howard, Ben Stone calling, guess what the fuck's up? Allison is going into labor and you are not fucking here, you know where you're at? Your at a fucking bar mitzvah in San Francisco you motherfucking piece of shit, and you know what I'm gonna have to do now? I'm going have to kill you, I'm gonna pop a fucking cap in your ass. You're dead, you're Tupac, you are fucking Biggie you piece of shit, I hope you fucking die or drop the chair and kill that fucking kid... I hope your plane crashes, peace fucker!
posted by me at 7:40 PM
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