Friday, February 14, 2014

Targeting the most vulnerable

Want to get rich quick?  Find a large group of people desperate for a miracle to alleviate something they can't eliminate on their own.  One such group is overweight Americans.  We love to eat, and we hate to sacrifice.  So we ask for a pill that will let us stuff our faces with the things we love, and still magically lose weight.

There is no magic bullet for this, at least not yet.  What troubles me isn't that the unscrupulous try to scam the vulnerable as much as the amazing audacity some of them show when doing it.  Adam Richman is one of my favorite TV hosts, period.  I love watching the shows he's done for the Travel Channel, especially the original "Man versus Food."  He never came right out and said specifically that one reason he stopped doing food challenges himself was due to his own health, but we all suspected that to be the case.

Now some scam artist is claiming that Adam used one of these magic bullets, garcinia cambogia to achieve his amazing weight loss.  While not quite just half the man he used to be, he's lost more than 60 pounds.  Without using this stuff that's been researched to death and proven to do little to produce weight loss.

So I checked out the website that's using him to pimp their crap.  They offer a "free" supply.  Only $4.95 for shipping and handling.  Until you get to the fine print that is.  Then you discover that if you don't cancel with 15 days, you owe $89.99 and will be billed that amount monthly for additional 30 day supplies of the useless supplement.  Three dollars a day for stuff that probably costs $3 or $4 for the entire monthly supply.  Might as well just build a press to print money, if you can find an endless supply of suckers to fall for your pitch.

Adam has taken to Twitter to let the world know this is a scam.  Caveat emptor my friends and remember, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

* * *

Since it's Valentine's Day, I'm channeling Newt Gingrich and writing the poem he would write to himself on this day, if he dared:

How do I love me, let me count the ways
I love me to the highest heights of my hypocrisy
I love me to the deepest depths of my debauchery,
and to the dirtiest of my deeds.
I love me to the broadest breadth of my boorishness.

I love me most, since my wives are merely appendages
that I place no value upon, and can always substitute one for another.
I love me most in life, except for my mother.
Oh how I love me, with passion unbridled.
I love me for all the strippers I diddled.

I will love me forever, and more so while I'm on TV
For that allows others to foolishly love me.
My love for myself grows with every day
For I find myself more perfect in each and every way.

* * *

The merger of Comcast and Time Warner harkens memories of the "good old days" when AT&T became a monopoly and ultimately had to be broken down through anti-trust litigation.  Everyone except the stockholders of the two companies is saying this will be a bad thing.  Oh, and the high muckety-mucks from the two firms.  They think it's great.

Between the two companies they will dominate roughly one-third of the cable TV market.  It is an industry that lacks sufficient competition already.  Then there's the fact that both of these companies generally suck when it comes to providing customer service.  The American Consumer Satisfaction Institute rated the TV and internet services of both companies as lowest in the nation among major providers.  AT&T's U-verse, Dish Network, Verizon's FIOS and DirecTV all ranked ahead of Comcast and Time Warner.  There have been ethical lapses at Time Warner in the past, including overcharging and secretly reviewing credit reports of customers and forcing those with low FICO scores to pay more for the same service as other clients.

Both Comcast and Time Warner oppose legislation that would require cable providers to give customers options involving "a la carte" purchasing of their service, which would allow customers to pick and choose which channels they want.  They claim this would make the service more expensive but in fact, it would probably save money for the consumer.

The bottom line here is that while this may be a good deal for the shareholders and the CEOs, it's going to be a very bad deal for those of us who are the customers of either.

* * *

Random Ponderings:

Drake is a major d-bag for whining he lost the cover of Rolling Stone to Philip Seymour Hoffman after the actor died of an OD.

Saddened to hear of the passing of former Angels manager Jim Fregosi.  he was an excellent player and manager of the game.  First man to hit for the cycle at Chavez Ravine.  Nice guy.  RIP.

After watching the "epic comeback" video of Baron Davis with Steve Nash, I've got to say that if Baron wants to play again he will.  He's been amazing us with his talents since the 7th grade.

Anyone surprised that the report on the investigation into whether or not Richie Incognito had verbally abused Jonathan Martin revealed that he had?  I'm not surprised.

Leonardo Dicaprio made the right call in turning down "Hocus Pocus" to do "What's Eating Gilbert Grape."

Kendall Jenner left her bra in her dressing room while modeling a sheer top, showing off her nipples.  In other breaking news, Barack Obama remains President of the U. S.

Tom Arnold claims that his weight loss is due in no small part to being able to work out at Arnold Schwarzenegger's home gym.  Arnold using Arnold's gym?  What's next, Don Johnson using the john in Van Johnson's van?

Tom Perkins is worth $8 billion and advancing the idea that if don't pay taxes, you don't get to vote, and for every dollar you pay in taxes, you'd get one vote.  I could spend all day listing why that's a horrific idea, but there's no point in doing so.  However, I am willing to make a wager.  He's whining about taxes, taxes, taxes.  I'll wager all the money I have in my pocket that his marginal tax rate on his 2012 income was less than 19%.

Where is the woman Hilary Clinton labeled a "narcissistic loony toon" today?  I guess nobody really cares to know.  It still boggles my mind to know the London School of Economics has a graduate program in social psychology.

Must be terrible for your camel to bite you, then escape and you get cited for having a camel without a permit.

Did you know that when bowling, a perfectly thrown strike ball actually makes contact with only four of the ten pins? 

It is very interesting that as the richest get richer, their philanthropy is apparently not growing at the same rate.

* * *

February 14th in History:

842 – Charles the Bald and Louis the German swear the Oaths of Strasbourg in the French and German languages.  (Isn't Charles the Bald what Hawkeye and B. J. called Charles Emerson Winchester on M*A*S*H?)
1014 – Pope Benedict VIII crowns Henry of Bavaria, King of Germany and of Italy, as Holy Roman Emperor.
1076 – Pope Gregory VII excommunicates Henry IV, Holy Roman Emperor.
1349 – Several hundred Jews are burned to death by mobs while the remainder of their population is forcibly removed from the city of Strasbourg.
1400 – Richard II dies, most likely from starvation, in Pontefract Castle, on the orders of Henry Bolingbroke.
1556 – Thomas Cranmer is declared a heretic.
1778 – The United States Flag is formally recognized by a foreign naval vessel for the first time, when French Admiral Toussaint-Guillaume Picquet de la Motte renders a nine gun salute to USS Ranger, commanded by John Paul Jones.
1779 – American Revolutionary War: the Battle of Kettle Creek is fought in Georgia.
1779 – James Cook is killed by Native Hawaiians near Kealakekua on the Island of Hawaii.
1797 – French Revolutionary Wars: Battle of Cape St. Vincent – John Jervis, (later 1st Earl of St Vincent) and Horatio Nelson (later 1st Viscount Nelson) lead the British Royal Navy to victory over a Spanish fleet in action near Gibraltar.
1804 – Karadjordje leads the First Serbian Uprising against the Ottoman Empire.
1831 – Ras Marye of Yejju marches into Tigray and defeats and kills Dejazmach Sabagadis in the Battle of Debre Abbay.
1835 – The original Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, in the Latter Day Saint movement, is formed in Kirtland, Ohio.
1849 – In New York City, James Knox Polk becomes the first serving President of the United States to have his photograph taken. (And ever since, the Secret Service has been watching out to make sure the President isn't photographed in flagrante delicto)
1852 – Great Ormond St Hospital for Sick Children, the first hospital in England to provide in-patient beds specifically for children (The National Children's Hospital in Dublin was founded over 30 years previously in 1821), is founded in London.
1855 – Texas is linked by telegraph to the rest of the United States, with the completion of a connection between New Orleans and Marshall, Texas.
1859 – Oregon is admitted as the 33rd U.S. state.
1876 – Alexander Graham Bell applies for a patent for the telephone, as does Elisha Gray.
1879 – The War of the Pacific breaks out when Chilean armed forces occupy the Bolivian port city of Antofagasta.
1899 – Voting machines are approved by the U.S. Congress for use in federal elections.
1900 – Second Boer War: In South Africa, 20,000 British troops invade the Orange Free State.
1903 – The United States Department of Commerce and Labor is established (later split into the Department of Commerce and the Department of Labor).
1912 – Arizona is admitted as the 48th U.S. state.
1912 – In Groton, Connecticut, the first diesel-powered submarine is commissioned.
1918 – The Soviet Union adopts the Gregorian calendar (on 1 February according to the Julian calendar).
1919 – The Polish–Soviet War begins.
1920 – The League of Women Voters is founded in Chicago.
1924 – The Computing-Tabulating-Recording Company changes its name to International Business Machines Corporation (IBM).
1929 – Saint Valentine's Day Massacre: Seven people, six of them gangster rivals of Al Capone's gang, are murdered in Chicago, Illinois.
1942 – Battle of Pasir Panjang contributes to the fall of Singapore.
1943 – World War II: Rostov-on-Don, Russia is liberated.
1943 – World War II: Tunisia Campaign – General Hans-Jürgen von Arnim's Fifth Panzer Army launches a concerted attack against Allied positions in Tunisia.
1944 – World War II: Anti-Japanese revolt on Java.
1945 – World War II: On the first day of the bombing of Dresden, the British Royal Air Force and the United States Army Air Forces begin fire-bombing Dresden, the capital of the German state of Saxony.
1945 – World War II: Navigational error leads to the mistaken bombing of Prague, Czechoslovakia by an American squadron of B-17s assisting in the Soviet's Vistula–Oder Offensive.
1945 – World War II: Mostar is liberated by Yugoslav partisans.
1945 – President Franklin D. Roosevelt meets with King Ibn Saud of Saudi Arabia aboard the USS Quincy, officially beginning U.S.-Saudi diplomatic relations.
1946 – The Bank of England is nationalized.
1949 – The Knesset (Israeli parliament) convenes for the first time.
1949 – The Asbestos Strike begins in Canada. The strike marks the beginning of the Quiet Revolution in Quebec.
1950 – Chinese Civil War: The National Revolutionary Army instigates the unsuccessful Battle of Tianquan against the People's Liberation Army.
1956 – The XX Congress of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union begins in Moscow. On the last night of the meeting, Premier Nikita Khrushchev condemns Joseph Stalin's crimes in a secret speech.
1961 – Discovery of the chemical elements: Element 103, Lawrencium, is first synthesized at the University of California.
1962 – First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy takes television viewers on a tour of the White House.
1966 – Australian currency is decimalised.
1979 – In Kabul, Setami Milli militants kidnap the American ambassador to Afghanistan, Adolph Dubs who is later killed during a gunfight between his kidnappers and police.
1981 – Stardust Disaster: A fire in a Dublin nightclub kills 48 people
1983 – United American Bank of Knoxville, Tennessee collapses. Its president, Jake Butcher, is later convicted of fraud.
1989 – Union Carbide agrees to pay $470 million to the Indian government for damages it caused in the 1984 Bhopal disaster.
1989 – Iranian leader Ruhollah Khomeini issues a fatwa encouraging Muslims to kill Salman Rushdie, author of The Satanic Verses.
1990 – Ninety-two people are killed aboard Indian Airlines Flight 605 at Bangalore, India.
1998 – An oil tanker train collides with a freight train in Yaoundé, Cameroon, spilling fuel oil. One person scavenging the oil created a massive explosion which kills 120.
2000 – The spacecraft NEAR Shoemaker enters orbit around asteroid 433 Eros, the first spacecraft to orbit an asteroid.
2002 – The Budapest Open Access Initiative, one of the cornerstones of the Open access movement, was released to the public.
2004 – In a suburb of Moscow, Russia, the roof of the Transvaal water park collapses, killing more than 25 people, and wounding more than 100 others.
2005 – Lebanese self-made billionaire and business tycoon Rafik Hariri is killed, along with 21 others, when explosives, equivalent of around 1,000 kg of TNT, are detonated as his motorcade drove near the St. George Hotel in Beirut.
2005 – Seven people are killed and 151 wounded in a series of bombings by suspected al-Qaeda-linked militants that hit the Philippines' Makati financial district in Metro Manila, Davao City, and General Santos City.
2005 – Youtube is launched by a group of college students, eventually becoming the largest video sharing website in the world and a main source for viral videos.
2008 – Northern Illinois University shooting: a gunman opened fire in a lecture hall of the DeKalb County, Illinois university resulting in 6 fatalities (including gunman) and 21 injuries.
2011 – As a part of Arab Spring, the Bahraini uprising, a series of demonstrations, amounting to a sustained campaign of civil resistance, in the Persian Gulf country of Bahrain begins with a 'Day of Rage'.

Famous Folk Born on February 14th:

Thomas Robert Malthus
Frederick Douglass
Julian Scott (Medal of Honor recipient)
George Washington Gale Ferris, Jr.
Jack Benny (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wNK1Jt4JLg)
Thelma Ritter
Johnny Longden
Mel Allen (a great broadcaster http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvBts2zZLUc)
Woody Hayes (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1QVy7rxYhg)
Jimmy Hoffa (still missing, but probably buried in the New Jersey turnpike)
Edward Platt (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-k-iJbjWAHM&list=PLisxEXIT16vO8gwjbDCPqcDPRoSKhOHvE)
Hugh Downs
Murray the K (I had no idea he was married six times)
Lois Maxwell (the first and best Miss Moneypenny http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7m-5y37xQ4)
Vic Morrow (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_c1in0Z98I)
Florence Henderson (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMaVuzZJIbA)
Fanne Foxe (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95fy6F5OJCQ)
James Maynard (thanks for many great steak dinners when I was in Mississippi)
Donna Shalala
Paul Tsongas
Michael Bloomberg
Andrew Robinson
Aaron Russo
Carl Bernstein
Gregory Hines (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3viQHsBFc4)
Teller
Roger Fisher
JoJo Starbuck
Odds Bodkin
Jim Kelly
Jules Asner
Simon Pegg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLquz4Iz-30)
Rob Thomas (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLquz4Iz-30)
Tyus Edney (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHceOvR464s)

Movie quotes today come from the one film credit of Jules Asner, "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back"

Tricia Jones: [on "Bluntman and Chronic: The Movie"] Well! That was just another paean to male adolescence and its refusal to grow up.
Alyssa Jones: Yeah, sis. But it was better than "Mallrats". At least Holden had the good sense to leave his name off of it.
Tricia Jones: Why didn't Miramax option his other comic instead. You know, the one about you and him and your "relationship"?
Alyssa Jones: Oh, "Chasing Amy"? That would never work as a movie.

#2

Jay: In a world gone mad, we will not spank the monkey, but the monkey will spank us.

#3

Jay: Don't you never say an unkind word about the Time! Me and Silent Bob modeled our whole fucking lives around Morris Day and Jerome. I'm a smooth pimp who loves the pussy. And Tubby here is my black man servant. What?

#4

Jay: Hey, wait a second! Aren't you the guy who fucked the pie!
Jason Biggs: You see! It's never "Hey! You're that guy from Loser" or "Hey you rocked in Boys and Girls." No, it always comes back to that fucking pie! I'm HAUNTED by it!
James Van Der Beek: You put your dick in a pie!