Where is Solomon when we need him?

There’s a legal dispute going on that is worthy of comment.  It involves a father, a mother, a daughter and a family who adopted the daughter.

The problem?  The mother gave up the daughter for adoption without the father’s consent.  Since the couple was still married at the time that’s a legal no-no.  Or so a judge has ruled.  But is it?  Do fathers have equal rights when it comes to children?

My answer will surprise you.  The answer is yes, and no.

Yes, a father has the same parental rights as a mother the moment the child is born.   But no, a father has no rights while the unborn fetus is still within the period where abortion is a viable alternative for the mother.

Let’s separate the two and start with abortion and get it out of the way.  A woman’s right to choose is her and hers alone because the father doesn’t have to bear the burden of the pregnancy.  It isn’t his body.  He doesn’t “own” a woman who is his wife.  He may have to care for her, and help her during that time; but in the long run the decision to terminate a pregnancy is the sole province of the woman.

However, once that woman gives birth to a child, the father’s rights kick in.  A mother simply cannot morally ignore the rights of the father, whether they are married or not.  The courts and legislatures may differ on this point but morally a father has the right to take custody of his child even if the mother doesn’t want him to.  The only situation where he might lose that right is if he is proven to be an unfit parent.  That a mother doesn’t want the father to raise her child isn’t proof of that.

In this specific case, an Army soldier was away from home when his child was born.  The mother promptly gave him up for adoption and he’s been fighting for two years to gain custody from the adoptive parents.  Now that a judge has ruled in his favor, the adoptive parents vow to appeal and keep fighting.  They need to just shut up and go away quietly.  I don’t care if they’ve had custody of that child for two days, two months, two years or two decades.  That man is that child’s biological father and he has rights.